Listening – James 1:19

This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger.

As I sat for over an hour listening, a friend shared how she was coping with the loss of her father and the troubling behavior of various family members during his brief illness and after his sudden death.

We had run into a deli for a quick lunch intending to take no more than twenty minutes, but my friend began to talk, and I was glued to my chair and attentive to her words.  I sensed that she had a profound need to tell her story and a parallel need for me to listen.

For once, I got it right.  I said little.  I simply listened, for I had nothing to add, no way to lessen her pain, no answers for the conflicts that swirled around her.  I could only give her my compassionate attention and promise to pray for the Lord to comfort her as she mourned the loss of her dad.[1]  Afterwards, I remembered a time when I needed someone to listen to me.  I wanted to tell my story, sometimes over and over again.  I felt an overwhelming poverty of love and longed for someone to pour the oil of kindness over my heart’s lacerations.  Though many years have passed, I still remember the loyal friends who forfeited their time to listen to me.

Though the basic principles of being a good listener are easily discernible, many of us too often ignore them since our love of talking crushes our desire to serve the one speaking, but by God’s grace, we are not hopeless cases.  As we seek to put ourselves aside, the Lord will place a crown of loving-kindness and compassion on our heads[2] and make us worthy to wear this holy adornment with honor and faithfulness.  He will enable us to listen with the heart of Christ to those in need of a friendly ear and silent lips.  He will teach us to be slow to respond and give us a desire above all else to minister in Christ’s name, to speak only as His Spirit gives us words of tenderness and healing.

Our Father, who anoints the lips of His beloved with grace,[3] will anoint ours when we ask Him to.  He will give us wisdom to discern the need of the moment, granting us joy in listening, so as we honor the Lord through faithful attention to others, our kindness will extend the love of Jesus, our Lord,[4] to those with wounded, sorrowing souls.

[1] Zechariah 7:9

[2] Psalm 103:4

[3] Psalm 45:2

[4] Proverbs 14:31